The hermit has been dumping much personal flap-trap lately, and so here is something a bit more useful, perhaps, or pertinent as to what the hermit ought to be focusing.
As to the feeling of being shoved to the edge of cliff and pushed off, or of being buried alive or suffocated, the sensations are very real, but one must remember Jesus' grace at Nazareth: He walked through their midst.
In the realm of the Diocese and the misconceptions, the seeming shut down of acceptance or utilization, the hermit must walk through the midst and remain in mind, soul and body at Agnus Dei, or in errands within the context of the rule of life and vows adopted and approved by the Spiritual Da, and with word still pending from the VG.
Rule of Life
Practice the Nine S’:
• Silence
• Solitude
• Slowness
• Suffering
• Selflessness
• Simplicity
• Stability
• Stillness
• Serenity
Live out these Scriptures:
Gospel of St. John
Epistle to the Hebrews
Overview: Fear God and delight in His commands
Motto and Mission: Just adore Him
Daily Routine: Mass, prayer, spiritual reading, manual labor, correspondence hospitality, rest, and confession weekly
Private Vow of Consecration to the Eremitical Life (December 29, 2000)
“I, [full name including confirmation saint name], offer and present myself to the goodness of God to serve in the order of an anchorite [adapted this from an old anchoritic rite]; and according to the rule of that order I promise to remain henceforward in the service of God through the grace of God and the guidance of the Roman Catholic Church and to render canonical obedience to my spiritual fathers.
“I vow to devote my life to the praise of God and salvation of the world through a stricter separation of the world, the silence of solitude, and assiduous prayer and penance.
“To the perfection of charity to which I am called as a faithful servant of my Lord Jesus Christ, I avow myself to the practice of chastity in celibacy, to poverty in body, mind and spirit, and to the obedience of my will to the Divine Will of God and His Church, in the Name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”
I added this parenthetical information for the VG, just in case he or the next Bishop decide to let me have a corner of the seed's burial hole:
[This vow could be repeated, if permitted, as temporary vows or simplified more. My financial advisor could provide proof of solvency, and I am willing to sign a waiver of liability as in the form in the LaCrosse guidebook or one legally drawn.]