Blogging Off

I'm going to be blogging off for awhile if not permanently. The blog began as a kind of private exercise in the process of learning what it is to be a complete hermit, from an incomplete hermit's viewpoint.

In the past week, much movement has occurred to help me become less incomplete, and I have discerned that my more completeness calls for more solitude and silence. One major hurdle that I grapple with is the sense of isolation, and the dying to self, which is necessary, or should be, for hermit life.

I have learned that one can be a privately consescrated hermit, and that is what I will be. As the week wore on, the complexities of public consecration did not settle well in my soul. Hiddenness became a great force, and writing a blog, although anonymously so, is not hidden enough for me at this juncture point.

I want to live the life of the nine s'. Even as far as annulments go (although I doubt it would be required since St. Nicholas of Flue was a hermit and yet had a wife and children living, who agreed to his going off to his mountain hut), and baptismal certificates and resumes, I am going to live the life of a privately consecrated hermit with few if any knowing what my life hidden in God is about. If they notice something of Christ through this window, or wonder about my little place here, Agnus Dei, I can share if it is necessary or charitable for them to know.

I am praying much that God will see me through to the other side of the agony of dying to self, of the emptying out from "doing". Even seeing the numerous blogs and sites of hermits on the internet rather sickened me, for it says we want to be heard and known, after all, like corpses with after-death reflex reaction, jerking back into the world. It is foolishness, really. So to die to the blog writing is my next step.

The goal is accomplished, anyway, as I have a far better idea of what is a complete hermit.